Essays From The Shadows Volume One These are short essays about survival, trauma, recovery, and the ongoing work of making sense of it all. Each piece is first posted within a survivor community, where it is read and discussed, before being shared here. 1. Maybe Aristotle Had A Point Hi, my name is Steve. I … Continue reading Maybe Aristotle Had A Point
Tag: abuse
Open Journal #59
Trigger Warning! Seriously, I’m not messing about I went to prison. There was a little period of my life where I stole things. I had no idea why. I know now it’s not unusual for survivors to do this—some twisted attempt at being seen. I never explored it too closely. It hardly matters. It wasn’t … Continue reading Open Journal #59
Open Journal #58
Message in a digital bottle. i have this odd urge to write to a lonely boy in a bedsit, a teenager who doesn't feel understood, a man alone because his divorce just came through and it all went wrong and he has no idea why but there is something that nags at his soul, a … Continue reading Open Journal #58
Open Journal #57
Unprotected. My therapist taught me that word. It soothed my soul. It was such a healing word to hear. Made me feel seen. It was so true. If I had been protected, my life would have been so different. I would have been so different. If we add this prism and look again, does it … Continue reading Open Journal #57
Open Journal #56
The Storage Unit Of My Mind I am sure it has been used a thousand times. It might even be that my therapist has used it many times himself. One day he described my brain as a storage unit. I imagined one of those ones you hire like a room with a roller shutter. You … Continue reading Open Journal #56
Open Journal #55
When a Boy Misplaces His Innocence I sometimes have these stray thoughts and I need to write them down. I want to explore the theme and where it takes me. Sometimes it feels as if they are disjointed and unconnected, but as I write, it kind of unravels and I see it clearer. I start … Continue reading Open Journal #55
Open Journal #52
This isn't a well-thought-out thing, just something I keep bumping against. I am talking with a young person (not on this site), who has recently disclosed and the abuse has only just ended, which means I get a rare snapshot of what it is like to be dealing with someone who is very close to … Continue reading Open Journal #52
Open Journal #50
We have taken to being on a video chat with each other while we do things — sometimes we’re at our desks, sometimes emptying a dishwasher — like an office for the work-from-home types. Just an American friend and I, chewing the fat, as I believe you call it. We fell into a conversation about … Continue reading Open Journal #50
Open Journal # 43
I thought I would focus on a couple of things my therapist discussed with me during our time together. Face to face, I mean. That latest session was full of moments where I saw things clearly for the first time. Subjects I had touched on before, here in chat and with him — snippets of … Continue reading Open Journal # 43
Open Journal #42
I think some weird things are happening. It almost feels as if some big things have cleared away and I can see other things I have never seen before. I bump into them, I catch myself saying something in conversation, or I am weeding the garden and an idle thought crosses my mind. A recent … Continue reading Open Journal #42