Essays from The ShadowsVolume Two Not any more. We are more than that. We do not inhabit a beige world; we are purple and orange.I don't even remember who taught me that line. 'We are not what they did to us in the dark.' It wraps around me. Makes me stand taller. Gives me a … Continue reading We are not what they did to us in the dark
Author: Steve Foster
Is that a euphemism in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?
Essays from The ShadowsVolume Two oral sex. sucking cock. blow job. blowie. going down. giving head. fellatio. sloppy toppy. nosh. hummer. gob job. lip service. gobble. suck off. swallow a sword. oral gratification. that act.i was taught to do it. we all were, probably. it is abuse 101. it is one of those things i … Continue reading Is that a euphemism in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?
Staying In Neutral
Essays from The ShadowsVolume TwoIn the last week of my father's life, he lingered. Like that party guest who just needs one more drink, he hung around and would not give up the ghost. Or simply become one.He had gone into hospital for a necessary procedure, with the understanding that he was unlikely to survive … Continue reading Staying In Neutral
Standing in the Spaces In-Between
Essays from The ShadowsVolume Two Without much effort, mainly because we have to, because necessity is the mother of invention, we get on and do what’s needed. Most of us only realise later what we’ve done. Maybe we never really give it a name.We have this ability to hold two truths at the same time. … Continue reading Standing in the Spaces In-Between
What’s a lesson you’ve learned recently that shifted your perspective?
i shouldn’t answer these but now i have seen it i want to. i like dipping my toe in the inkwell of truthI experienced this moment In a room with two men and i have never felt so safe and nurtured There was this moment where i understood it was ok to tell them anything … Continue reading What’s a lesson you’ve learned recently that shifted your perspective?
Nominally Not Nurtured
Essays from The ShadowsVolume Two Neglect takes many forms. I can look around and see worse examples of an upbringing. Always someone poorer. Always someone richer. In the same way, there are people more abused and less abused. We don't rank people. Apparently.A feature of my own very special way of looking at things seems … Continue reading Nominally Not Nurtured
Hit 5,000 steps today and drop your achievement here
Oh please stop it! I know I should walk, I know it is good for me, I know I sometimes enjoy it when I do. Mostly I think of it as the most pointless thing. To be walking nowhere. Not to get somewhere or arrive anywhere, just the act of walking for the sake of … Continue reading Hit 5,000 steps today and drop your achievement here
Strong
Essays from The ShadowsVolume Two You will not be surprised to learn that my internal monologue is relentless and quite sharp and tetchy. I come up with cutting exit lines, edit, rewind, try again. I answer people in my head, then flounder around for a better, more polite answer while all the time trying to … Continue reading Strong
The Politics of Hugging
Essays from The ShadowsVolume Two Yesterday, a friend and I met with someone he knew really well, me not so much. I had met him a few times, in passing. When we arrived, he hugged my friend, long and hard. I watched and when it came to my turn, I stuck out my hand because … Continue reading The Politics of Hugging
If you could instantly master any skill, what would it be and why?
This question keeps popping up in various guises. My standard answer is to play the piano, fence, and maybe speak French fluently. Mostly because whenever I see people doing those things, they look like cool things to be able to do.As you get older, your ambitions reduce to some really basic things. There was a … Continue reading If you could instantly master any skill, what would it be and why?